a musing

it's funny how when you find something you thought you lost it makes you SO happy that you wonder if the fact that you lost it was a blessing. this just happened with my ipod... luke lost it like a week ago and i was sure he took it into a store and dropped it or something. needless to say i was really bummed and tried not to think about it. then today while i was cleaning out the car i found it wedged under the driver's seat. so now my day is great because i found my ipod- whereas had i never lost (and found) it my day might be more on the crappy side since i have been dealing with insurance crap and i'm really tired.

i think this ties into the theory that if there was no bad there could be no good. i try to remind myself that the fact that i have been dealing with depression for almost 20 years is a blessing in disguise... just as it keeps me from seeing any good in life whatsoever when i am down, it allows me to see SO MUCH GOOD on the days when i am up. stuff that i might not have ever even been aware of had i been 'happy' all the time. i don't know if i am at the point where i could say that i'm GLAD that i get depressed - but i do know that there is a part of me that is grateful for it.

and i'm grateful that i found my ipod.